


why wasn't it enough for me?

by hyuckithmelon



Category: Haikyuu!!
Genre: Angst, Friends With Benefits, Insecurity, Jealousy, M/M, Unrequited Love, a bit of, but thats in the past giggles, i feel bad for the cashier woman in this ngl, im sorry for turning ushijima into heather, rated T bc author has potty mouth syndrome
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-11-02
Updated: 2020-11-02
Packaged: 2021-03-09 04:01:07
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 417
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/27338338
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/hyuckithmelon/pseuds/hyuckithmelon
Summary: Atsumu gets reminded that citrus and mint were Sakusa's favorite scent.(And that it was never meant to be.)
Relationships: Miya Atsumu/Sakusa Kiyoomi
Comments: 1
Kudos: 32
Collections: Haikyuu Angst Week 2020





	why wasn't it enough for me?

“Your total will be ¥320.”

As Atsumu pays for the hand sanitizer, old habits die hard you could say, he feels a buzz from his phone. He didn’t want to check it, but his hands make his way to his pockets pulling out the cursed item. 

The cashier woman hands over the bag, telling him to have a ‘good day.’  _ My day’s been shit _ , he thinks before mumbling a ‘thank you.’ He frowns at the notification. 

_ Sakusa Kiyoomi  _ **@skk_0320** _ 2m _

I love him so much.

[a selfie is attached, Sakusa and Ushijima are seen, two small smiles on their faces.]

Atsumu and Sakusa’s friends with benefits relationship lasted from their last year of highschool to a few months before Sakusa started dating Ushijima. He scoffed to himself, kicking a pebble onto the road. His heart wrenched seeing the two together now. 

At first, he was okay. He understood it was going to happen, hell, they even made an agreement the moment either one of them got in a serious relationship, they’d stop whatever the hell they were. It’s some fucking curse that was only strengthened every time their lips, their tongues, their hands brushed against each other’s. And then all the regret, all that acceptence just hit him like a tsunami tumbling it’s way onto Japan.

Everything just seemed to crumble in his own hands and he didn’t stop it.

Sometimes Atsumu’s selfishness got the best of him and he thought just maybe, maybe there was something between them. Maybe things were possible for them. Maybe Atsumu had a shot with him. 

Maybe Sakusa and Miya could happen. (He always thought that had a nice ring to it.)

So just why the hell was Atsumu not satisfied with what he was able to get?

Was he just unlovable? Was he destined to be a lone bastard who’s stuck in unrequited love? Was he just good for a good fuck then he’s just no one anymore? Why was it not enough for him? He gave it the best he could then why, why, why the hell wasn’t it enough?

_ Fuck,  _ he knows he’s better than nothing it’s just so goddamn hard to believe that. He stuffs the phone in his pocket, looking at the hand-sanitizer in the convenience store bag. He takes it out and squirts a bit of it onto his hands. It smells like citrus and mint. Sakusa’s favorite.

Old habits die too fucking hard, and Atsumu wonders when he will stop digging his own grave.

**Author's Note:**

> wee woo wee woo angst go brr
> 
> twitter: koutaroism (i will learn how to link my twt.. one day... one day.)


End file.
